I am in constant confusion and my stomach is turning ever hour. I can't sleep nor hardly eat.
Thinking of what seems to be the destiny makes me gag and my mind keeps staggering; like a deer zig-zagging in front of an oncoming car.
I only feel pain; that of a broken and crushed heart that can never be perfect. The pieces of shattered glass of which I feel I am walking on carve into my feet making me weak and unable to hardly stand.
It feels that every day I am in a hallway pacing back and forth and waiting for the doctor to tell me that my best friend died. I wake up and feel that every. single. day.
Stagnant. Frozen in time. A life on pause.
I keep going in the room to see if I can do anything, give a lung, a soul or a life but I am helpless as well as hopeless.
Whatever will that's in me keeps pressing through, keeps waiting, keeps listening and keeps a thing called hope closest to my heart.
